18 June 2009

Sense of Impending Doom

Do you ever have that foreboding feeling when nothing is really wrong? You know, it's kind of like the feeling you have when you know you have to have root canal. Or an unavoidable confrontation with a difficult person. Or give birth. It's that pit-in-the-stomach feeling that won't go away until the unpleasant event has passed.

But what about those times when that feeling pops up for no apparent reason? That's how I'm feeling today.

Maybe it's because both my daughters are having their wisdom teeth extracted over the next few days and one of them doesn't want anesthesia. Wait, she wants local anesthesia, but nothing to numb her mind. I explained to her this is one of the few times in her life when she can legally enjoy a mind-numbing drug, so why not go for it? Ok, not really. I told her all the NICE reasons why she should be drugged up and asleep when they yank out her teeth. (And just for the record, all four teeth are impacted. Yeah.)

Maybe it's because I'm going to be doing some traveling in July, and our budget is already bursting at the seams. The travel is already set in stone, has been planned for quite some time, and I'm actually looking forward to it - but even though most things are already paid for, life is always more expensive than we think. Especially when traveling.

Maybe it's because the last day of school is tomorrow and my kids don't yet have summer jobs. Of course, they do have school work to do over the summer for their upcoming A.P. classes in the fall, because giving the kids school work to do over Thanksgiving, Christmas, Winter Break, Spring Break, and all the long weekends during the school year just ISN'T ENOUGH. Let's let the schools take over their summer vacations, too!

Maybe it's nothing. Maybe it's getting older and seeing life fly by at an alarming pace. Maybe it's the fact that I didn't sleep well last night. Or maybe it's that it's going to rain again tonight. And tomorrow. And the next day. And the next.

Yep, that's it. Thank you, internet therapy, for helping me figure this out. Have a nice day.

Copyright © 2009 - Paulla Estes

1 comment:

Brian said...

Just found your post by searching for "Sense of Impending Doom". I've been feeling exactly that same way today -- feeling like somethings not right, or is about to go wrong in my life, or whatever. But I know its totally bogus. I think its because I'm stressed, haven't slept much lately, and am kind of deep in thought over a budding relationship.

I don't want to think about it because I believe that what we think about has a tendency to play out in our lives, but I wanted to see if anyone else had recognized a similar feeling.

I do have anxiety and have had panic-attacks in the past, but its pretty much under control thanks to Celexa; and this is pretty different from a sense of physical danger due to illness. Its just a generic "blah" sort of feeling that has no known source or reason behind it.