Our orange cat, Jack, fails at being a cat. He's a great dog - golden retriever to be precise - but he's lousy at doing cat-type things. Not that this is a bad thing.
Jack comes when you call him. He rolls on his back when anyone walks into the room. He smiles when you pet him or scratch him under his chin. He isn't good at sharpening his claws and he's terrible at chasing things. He will, however, hold his favorite toy in his mouth and roll around on the floor. Like a dog.
The only cat-like things he does are to jump up and sit on top of the refrigerator (though I swear, he still looks and acts like a dog while up there) and he uses the litter box. Thank God.
We used to have a German Shepherd who was messy when she ate and drank. She slurped her food, and when she drank from her water bowl, she drooled it across the entire kitchen floor. Not fun for those walking through the kitchen wearing only socks on their feet. Jack is like this. In fact, before he drinks, he puts his paw in the water to check the temperature - or something - and then shakes water off his paw before drinking.
The other weird thing he does is that he Talks. All. The. Time. He doesn't always meow, but he sort of mutters to himself, commenting on his route as he walks along. When I wake up in the morning, he walks into our bedroom muttering, and jumps up onto the bed, telling me what's what. As I walk down the stairs to feed him, he shows me the way and gives me a guided tour. When I get the food bag out of the cupboard, he gets a bit frantic and his muttering turns to excited yelling. And so it goes throughout the day.
If you've ever seen the movie, Rainman, you can imagine this cat... "You know I'm not wearing any underwear, I'm definitely not wearing any underwear."
Or if he gets hit by our prissy female cat, Isabel, who hates his dog-like ways, it's... "I'm an excellent cat. Really, I'm an excellent cat. And Isabel sucks."
At meal time it's...
"Four minutes to Wapner, four minutes to Wapner, four minutes to Wapner!"
Maybe I should take him to Vegas?
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